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Thursday, February 3, 2011

I need an angry elf

Well, my school week is over and now begins the headache. I wont complain I'm sure many others have it worse. School from one to ten monday through thursday. Usually thursdays are a short day for me but my lab partner (i mean lab associate...i want my blog to be politically correct) and I messed up the measurements of sulfuric acid in our solutions which were meant to help us understand what reaction rates are and how they work with certain concentrations, but I usually just learn how to combine new vulgarities in my head. The rates of which are exceptionally fast. This is the first reason why I need an angry elf that I can call into existence at any given moment. He will be able to read my mind and will proceed to do cartwheels over the lab tables while verbalizing all of my vulgar thoughts.

 I now dread going to phlebotomy because my classmates have no concept of the difference between my veins and my nerves. So basically a vein is rubber like and bounces like a spring. As apposed to a nerve which is hard like a wire and doesn't move when you touch it. Usually they feel a vein and then think "oh thats a fat one! ill get that!" then they set up their needle, probably just giddy with excitement over their find, thinking about how much candy and cookies they would treat themselves too later for doing such a great job. Then they come back over to my arm which has veins that you can see from across the room. They anchor my arm and proceed to stick (cue the "thats what she said from all my grown up friends") me like a dart board wherever they please. Today was exceptionally painful as my brachial nerve was almost severed by a student. She's a sweet girl so i don't blame her. I blame her parents. This is the third reason I need an angry elf. At the catalyst of an incompetent stick my elf will appear and proceed to (with his mind powers) stimulate every nerve in that persons body until they drop the class.

Three pokes in my left arm, two in my right and three in my hands. Pity me will make me feel better.  For my next trick I need to do the weeks homework, start a major project, track my lost W2 from the oh so wise people at American Eagle payroll, finish my application to ASU, and keep my sanity. I don't really know what else I need an angry elf for but I'm sure I can think of some later.

On a positive note I live thousands of miles away from Egypt.

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